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| Tanaka Farms - pumpkin patch |
I love birthdays. I love celebrating people, buying the perfect gift and making them feel special. When it comes to my birthday, I love celebrating all October long, with as many people as possible and planning each event with care. But the past two years, birthdays have been painful - the calendar marking another year of what I don't have, can't control and want more than anything. Last year on my birthday, I woke up crying because we had completed three rounds of IUI (intrauterine insemination) without success. This year, we had to unexpectedly put the adoption on hold for six months. All I wanted for my birthday was to be able to move forward with the adoption. Early October found me in a place I really didn't expect - despair and hopelessness. I felt empty. I kept looking at others in our lives and seeing how God answered their prayers and I was angry that He wasn't doing the same for us. My heart just kept saying "why, God?". I couldn't even form the words to pray. It felt like I had nothing more to offer or ask. But the beautiful thing is, He was there even in my anger and silence. And He answered, not in the way I imagined, but in the way we needed. Chris received a job offer for an amazing company a few days before my birthday and started one week after my birthday. As silly as it may sound, God redeemed my birthday. He brought joy and hope back to a month I love. I'm so excited to say that with this new job, we are able to get back on track with the adoption.
A new goal of ours is to explore LA, so in that spirit, when it came time for a birthday date, we went to the Last Bookstore and Alfred Tea Room. The Last Bookstore is every book-lovers dream! We came home with several gorgeous old books, including some collector's Sherlock editions because I can't seem to stop myself...and a life goal of ours is to have wall to wall, floor to ceiling books, so we keep buying books. We are already assembling a library for Baby Shoe so they can have a lovely library as well :) Because Hubs knows tea makes everything better, we went to a very pink tea shop and I sunk into some Early Grey with lavender. Best birthday date ever with my favorite person.
There's an amazing restaurant within walking distance of our house that we've been taking everyone to. My amazing family is no exception. They have loved and supported us through the hardest year of our lives. They have prayed over us, encouraged us, cried with us and rejoiced with us. This journey would be infinitely harder without them.
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| Girls Luncheon <3 |
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| 4th Street Market with sweet Baby Row |
Happy Birthday Month to my mom, father-in-law, cousin, roommate, assorted friends and who knows, maybe Baby Shoe as well.
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There's an amazing restaurant within walking distance of our house that we've been taking everyone to. My amazing family is no exception. They have loved and supported us through the hardest year of our lives. They have prayed over us, encouraged us, cried with us and rejoiced with us. This journey would be infinitely harder without them. 
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